That time of year again...
So December is in full swing and once again another year is quickly coming to its demise. What does that mean you ask? Time for a little retrospection. So here it is, once again, 2005 reflected upon....
1) What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Made amends- of course, I have fixed relationships and friendships before, but this was a year of really confronting my past- who I was, who I am and who I want to become- and taking concerted steps steps towards fixing what I dislike about my life and working towards the future. This has been an amazing year of self-reflection.
2) Did you keep your New Years resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Some yes, some no. In the most part yes, but I don't know if I ever made "Resolutions" per say- just had a few goals that I wanted to improve upon by the end of the Year. There has been notable improvement.
3) Did someone close to you give birth? No, but my oldest and dearest friend got married and I was her maid of honor!
4)Did anyone close to you die? No. people close to those i care about died, but no one I know in particular.
5) What countries did you visit? HAHA! Like I had time to travel...
6) What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005? Self-discipline. A lot more of it.
7) What dates from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? Chantal's wedding, Getting back with Victoria, Elections night, Inititations, blind date night, NIN, Easter dinner, and probably X-Mas dinner (I love to cook!), Karaoke Tuesdays, Sunday night masses, drinking camp, so many others. What a year!
8)What was your biggest achievement of the year? Learning to look fondly upon the past- forcing myself to let go of old scars. AND finishing the two surveys- stupid surveys.
9) What was your biggest failure? If i could change something, I would have given myself more sleep. I think that added a lot of stress.
10)Did you suffer illness or injury? I did. But I'm better now. And DAMN that feels good. Except that my foot still hurts...sucky. Maybe I should start being nicer to it.
11) What was the best thing you bought? My laptop. it was also the worst thing. Stupid addiction to the internet!
12) Whose behavior merited celebration? In different ways, the following people stood out a lot for me this year: Phil, Antoine, Joanne/Ryan, the DUs, Krystal McLay, Sarah, Graham, Cory, Chantal/Jeff, Tasha and Victoria.
13) Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? A few female friends- whom I expected better of. But no one's behavior made me depressed. Only you can control your own feelings...
14) Where did most of your money go? Liquor, it's always liquor...and yes, it's always worth it. And YES, that's the same answer as last year.
15) What did you get really, really, really excited about? Working, CTA, Tal's wedding, Wake, hearing from Aaron, living with Sarah, living with Jo and doing a lot of composing. Oh, and Nine Inch Nails- GOOD TIMES.
16)What song will always remind you of 2005? Anything by Zeppelin, Pink Floyd- both were very big for me this year- paradise by the dashboard light, anything by Ani Difranco and Liz Phair. This was the year of angry female songstresses.
17)Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or hardened? happier and a a lot 'softer'- I think I've definately mellowed out a lot. Feels good.
ii. thinner or fatter? Thinner and I'm going to keep getting thinner. SWEET.
iii. richer or poorer?definitely poorer! richer
18) What do you wish you'd done more of? Slept. So so so sleep deprived.
19) What do you wish you'd done less of? Analyzed instead of felt.
20) How will you be spending Christmas? FINALLY with my mom and Antoine. And without Phil, which makes me much much sadder than anyone can imagine. i will miss you so much Phil.
21) Did you fall in love in 2005? That's a little hard to answer right now. I'm not sure if anything was love per say, I guess I'll know that once I can look back more objectively. But I felt very very strongly about 2 people. And I'm not sure where that will go, in terms of coming to terms with my emotions.
22)Any one-night stands? One night stands are not my thing. Never have been. I have to make mistakes SEVERAL times before I realize how dumb I am. :)
23) What was your favorite TV program? LOST, 24, the Simpsons.
24) Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? I believe that I can safely say that I hate someone for the first time in my life. But she has it coming. I hope that this feeling passes with time- I don't like hating people. And she's not worth it.
25)What was the best book you read? My Bible. Yes, for real.
26) What was your greatest musical discovery? Metallica, Pink Floyd and Ani Difranco. Also, musical discovery: I really love to compose and I deal with emotions best when I have my piano with me.
27) What did you want and not get? You know- I really can't bitch much about not getting anything- I really kind of did get everything, in a weird way. But sometimes getting what you want really isn't what you want... I guess I still didn't really get good health, but in such a different way that I can't even begin to compare. It was good to not feel like I was dying.
28) What did you NOT want and GOT? Surprisingly, I never thought I would want to have certain people back in my life. I've always been the kind of person to just walk away from it all- and never look back. A few people made this impossible this year- so I gues the answer would be a serious walk down memory lane and the chance to change the ending of several stories. Hearing from Aaron again was epiphanous.
29) Favorite film of this year? Hmm...there's a few: The Cinderella Man hit a chord with me- the main character reminded me of my brother, Crash, Sin City, Batman Begins to name a few. I'm sure I'm missing some...
30) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 24 on April 21, 2005. I went to scholars and to avenue on 2 seperate days. My birthday was quite nice actually. Many of my friends came out. I was much much more sober than I had been in the past.
31) What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Again, Health- but in a different way. No broken bones. And if Chantal lived closer- I hadn't realized how much I missed her.
32)How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005? One of two extremes: Lazy or Very professional. I either cleaned up REAL good, or didn't clean up at all. And embracing my curly hair- I still hate it, but I don't fight it anymore.
33)What kept you sane? Krystal, Phil, Antoine, Tasha, Victoria, Miles, Suzie my piano, and- as cliche as this sounds- God and prayer.
34) Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Johnny Depp= still so hot. Gilles Duceppe turns on the political hack in me- I don't agree with his politics but he's still super cool. Dr. Indira, the new University Prez has made a real impression on me too.
35) What political issue stirred you the most? I didn't really get stirred up by politics the way that I usually do. I guess Ellen's nomination race stirred me to a certain extent. But my focus and priorities changed a lot this year- I am seriously less hackish.
36) Who do you miss? Chantal, Aaron, many others... and my Dad. I miss my dad in a huge way. It will be three years on the 16th- and it was yesterday...
37) Who was the best new person you met? New people all together: Sarah Colpitts and Graham Lettner. No contest. Best new person I have gotten better acquainted with? Krystal, Tasha and Joanne. Best new person I used to know really well and am stupid happy to have back: Aaron, the DU alum and Victoria.
38) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004: Sometimes the best thing you can do is look back- it's okay to let old scars heal, it's okay to forgive people, and most importantly it's okay to understand that people change and that pride is NOT the only determining factor in your life. Getting lost in the past is silly- ignoring the past is ignorant.
39) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: hmmm...there are SO SO SO many that would work- I'm going to name a few stanzas and see how that works instead:
"Measuring a summer's day- always find it slips away to gray-the hours, they bring me pain." Led Zeppelin 'Tangerine'
"The best years of my life gone by, here I am alone and blue.
Some people cry and some people die by the wicked ways of love;
But I'll just keep on rollin' along with the grace of the Lord above" Led Zeppelin 'Heartbreaker'
"I've got a mouse and he hasn't got a house- I don't know why, I call him Gerald! He's getting rather old but he's a good mouse" Pink Floyd, Bike.
"Shine on you crazy diamond"- Pink Floyd, 'Shine on you crazy diamond'
"You know in all my life I never found- what I couldn't resist, what I couldn't turn down. I could walk away from anyone I ever knew- but I can't walk away from you" Garth Brooks- Shameless
"I'm still here cause I've got nothing else to do- you're an asshole but I'm getting used to you" Ani Difranco- Used to You
"Fuck you, and your untouchable face- and fuck you for existing in the first place" Ani Difranco- Untouchable Face
"And I've got no illusions about you- and guess what, I never did. When I said, when I said I'd take it, I meant, I meant as is."
Ani Difranco As Is.
"I'm a slow dying flower in the frost killing hour- the sweet turning sour and untouchable" Nathalie Merchant
"Average Every Day Sane Psycho SuperGoddess"- Liz Phair 'Extraordinairy'
"Flower" by Liz Phair- just read the lyrics. I won't even bother to put any here.
"I am not worried - I am not overly concerned with the status of my emotions
"oh", She says, "we're changing." - but were always changing
It does not bother me to say this isn't love because if you don't want to talk about it then it isn't love
and I guess I'm going to have to live that
but, I'm sure there's something in a shade of gray or something in between
and I can always change my name if that's what you mean" - Counting Crows- 'Anna Begins'.(**This ranks high as being the song of the year for me**)
"I wanna be a lion- hey, everybody wants to pass as cats; we all wanna be big stars but we've got different reasons for that."
-Counting Crows- Mr. Jones
I could totally keep going. This has really been a year of music. But those are the big ones I can think of right now.
"Impossible" and "No-Re-Entry" kind of sum up my year too...but they are my own compositions so I don't know if they count.
Well that's all folks. All in all, 2005 has been kick ass. Especially the last four months of it! To sum it all up, I'm sorry to see it end, but I'm super excited for 2006. I turn a quarter of century old, graduate university, start my masters and the sky is the limit from there!
Livin', Lovin'
Zita
1) What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Made amends- of course, I have fixed relationships and friendships before, but this was a year of really confronting my past- who I was, who I am and who I want to become- and taking concerted steps steps towards fixing what I dislike about my life and working towards the future. This has been an amazing year of self-reflection.
2) Did you keep your New Years resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Some yes, some no. In the most part yes, but I don't know if I ever made "Resolutions" per say- just had a few goals that I wanted to improve upon by the end of the Year. There has been notable improvement.
3) Did someone close to you give birth? No, but my oldest and dearest friend got married and I was her maid of honor!
4)Did anyone close to you die? No. people close to those i care about died, but no one I know in particular.
5) What countries did you visit? HAHA! Like I had time to travel...
6) What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005? Self-discipline. A lot more of it.
7) What dates from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? Chantal's wedding, Getting back with Victoria, Elections night, Inititations, blind date night, NIN, Easter dinner, and probably X-Mas dinner (I love to cook!), Karaoke Tuesdays, Sunday night masses, drinking camp, so many others. What a year!
8)What was your biggest achievement of the year? Learning to look fondly upon the past- forcing myself to let go of old scars. AND finishing the two surveys- stupid surveys.
9) What was your biggest failure? If i could change something, I would have given myself more sleep. I think that added a lot of stress.
10)Did you suffer illness or injury? I did. But I'm better now. And DAMN that feels good. Except that my foot still hurts...sucky. Maybe I should start being nicer to it.
11) What was the best thing you bought? My laptop. it was also the worst thing. Stupid addiction to the internet!
12) Whose behavior merited celebration? In different ways, the following people stood out a lot for me this year: Phil, Antoine, Joanne/Ryan, the DUs, Krystal McLay, Sarah, Graham, Cory, Chantal/Jeff, Tasha and Victoria.
13) Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? A few female friends- whom I expected better of. But no one's behavior made me depressed. Only you can control your own feelings...
14) Where did most of your money go? Liquor, it's always liquor...and yes, it's always worth it. And YES, that's the same answer as last year.
15) What did you get really, really, really excited about? Working, CTA, Tal's wedding, Wake, hearing from Aaron, living with Sarah, living with Jo and doing a lot of composing. Oh, and Nine Inch Nails- GOOD TIMES.
16)What song will always remind you of 2005? Anything by Zeppelin, Pink Floyd- both were very big for me this year- paradise by the dashboard light, anything by Ani Difranco and Liz Phair. This was the year of angry female songstresses.
17)Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or hardened? happier and a a lot 'softer'- I think I've definately mellowed out a lot. Feels good.
ii. thinner or fatter? Thinner and I'm going to keep getting thinner. SWEET.
iii. richer or poorer?definitely poorer! richer
18) What do you wish you'd done more of? Slept. So so so sleep deprived.
19) What do you wish you'd done less of? Analyzed instead of felt.
20) How will you be spending Christmas? FINALLY with my mom and Antoine. And without Phil, which makes me much much sadder than anyone can imagine. i will miss you so much Phil.
21) Did you fall in love in 2005? That's a little hard to answer right now. I'm not sure if anything was love per say, I guess I'll know that once I can look back more objectively. But I felt very very strongly about 2 people. And I'm not sure where that will go, in terms of coming to terms with my emotions.
22)Any one-night stands? One night stands are not my thing. Never have been. I have to make mistakes SEVERAL times before I realize how dumb I am. :)
23) What was your favorite TV program? LOST, 24, the Simpsons.
24) Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? I believe that I can safely say that I hate someone for the first time in my life. But she has it coming. I hope that this feeling passes with time- I don't like hating people. And she's not worth it.
25)What was the best book you read? My Bible. Yes, for real.
26) What was your greatest musical discovery? Metallica, Pink Floyd and Ani Difranco. Also, musical discovery: I really love to compose and I deal with emotions best when I have my piano with me.
27) What did you want and not get? You know- I really can't bitch much about not getting anything- I really kind of did get everything, in a weird way. But sometimes getting what you want really isn't what you want... I guess I still didn't really get good health, but in such a different way that I can't even begin to compare. It was good to not feel like I was dying.
28) What did you NOT want and GOT? Surprisingly, I never thought I would want to have certain people back in my life. I've always been the kind of person to just walk away from it all- and never look back. A few people made this impossible this year- so I gues the answer would be a serious walk down memory lane and the chance to change the ending of several stories. Hearing from Aaron again was epiphanous.
29) Favorite film of this year? Hmm...there's a few: The Cinderella Man hit a chord with me- the main character reminded me of my brother, Crash, Sin City, Batman Begins to name a few. I'm sure I'm missing some...
30) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 24 on April 21, 2005. I went to scholars and to avenue on 2 seperate days. My birthday was quite nice actually. Many of my friends came out. I was much much more sober than I had been in the past.
31) What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Again, Health- but in a different way. No broken bones. And if Chantal lived closer- I hadn't realized how much I missed her.
32)How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005? One of two extremes: Lazy or Very professional. I either cleaned up REAL good, or didn't clean up at all. And embracing my curly hair- I still hate it, but I don't fight it anymore.
33)What kept you sane? Krystal, Phil, Antoine, Tasha, Victoria, Miles, Suzie my piano, and- as cliche as this sounds- God and prayer.
34) Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Johnny Depp= still so hot. Gilles Duceppe turns on the political hack in me- I don't agree with his politics but he's still super cool. Dr. Indira, the new University Prez has made a real impression on me too.
35) What political issue stirred you the most? I didn't really get stirred up by politics the way that I usually do. I guess Ellen's nomination race stirred me to a certain extent. But my focus and priorities changed a lot this year- I am seriously less hackish.
36) Who do you miss? Chantal, Aaron, many others... and my Dad. I miss my dad in a huge way. It will be three years on the 16th- and it was yesterday...
37) Who was the best new person you met? New people all together: Sarah Colpitts and Graham Lettner. No contest. Best new person I have gotten better acquainted with? Krystal, Tasha and Joanne. Best new person I used to know really well and am stupid happy to have back: Aaron, the DU alum and Victoria.
38) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004: Sometimes the best thing you can do is look back- it's okay to let old scars heal, it's okay to forgive people, and most importantly it's okay to understand that people change and that pride is NOT the only determining factor in your life. Getting lost in the past is silly- ignoring the past is ignorant.
39) Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: hmmm...there are SO SO SO many that would work- I'm going to name a few stanzas and see how that works instead:
"Measuring a summer's day- always find it slips away to gray-the hours, they bring me pain." Led Zeppelin 'Tangerine'
"The best years of my life gone by, here I am alone and blue.
Some people cry and some people die by the wicked ways of love;
But I'll just keep on rollin' along with the grace of the Lord above" Led Zeppelin 'Heartbreaker'
"I've got a mouse and he hasn't got a house- I don't know why, I call him Gerald! He's getting rather old but he's a good mouse" Pink Floyd, Bike.
"Shine on you crazy diamond"- Pink Floyd, 'Shine on you crazy diamond'
"You know in all my life I never found- what I couldn't resist, what I couldn't turn down. I could walk away from anyone I ever knew- but I can't walk away from you" Garth Brooks- Shameless
"I'm still here cause I've got nothing else to do- you're an asshole but I'm getting used to you" Ani Difranco- Used to You
"Fuck you, and your untouchable face- and fuck you for existing in the first place" Ani Difranco- Untouchable Face
"And I've got no illusions about you- and guess what, I never did. When I said, when I said I'd take it, I meant, I meant as is."
Ani Difranco As Is.
"I'm a slow dying flower in the frost killing hour- the sweet turning sour and untouchable" Nathalie Merchant
"Average Every Day Sane Psycho SuperGoddess"- Liz Phair 'Extraordinairy'
"Flower" by Liz Phair- just read the lyrics. I won't even bother to put any here.
"I am not worried - I am not overly concerned with the status of my emotions
"oh", She says, "we're changing." - but were always changing
It does not bother me to say this isn't love because if you don't want to talk about it then it isn't love
and I guess I'm going to have to live that
but, I'm sure there's something in a shade of gray or something in between
and I can always change my name if that's what you mean" - Counting Crows- 'Anna Begins'.(**This ranks high as being the song of the year for me**)
"I wanna be a lion- hey, everybody wants to pass as cats; we all wanna be big stars but we've got different reasons for that."
-Counting Crows- Mr. Jones
I could totally keep going. This has really been a year of music. But those are the big ones I can think of right now.
"Impossible" and "No-Re-Entry" kind of sum up my year too...but they are my own compositions so I don't know if they count.
Well that's all folks. All in all, 2005 has been kick ass. Especially the last four months of it! To sum it all up, I'm sorry to see it end, but I'm super excited for 2006. I turn a quarter of century old, graduate university, start my masters and the sky is the limit from there!
Livin', Lovin'
Zita
posted by Zita Dube @ Tuesday, December 13, 2005
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